Given that sunglasses are deemed part of the fashion world, it is not surprising that designers come up with some pretty outlandish looks. There have been some real eyewear zingers over the years. From hard-to-look-at cat eyes to a brand-new line designed to bring out the best of Andy Warhol (if that’s possible), it seems some people just like ugly sunglasses.
Are you curious as to just how bad it can get? Well, you are in luck. Below is a list of the top five worst ideas for sunglasses. You will have to try to imagine them without the help of pictures. As a side note, many of the shades on this list go back to the 1980s. That was a strange decade, indeed.
1. Shutter Shades
A number of pop stars like Culture Club’s Boy George made shutter shades a household item when they first came out. If you don’t know what shutter shades are, just imagine a pair of sunglasses with no lenses in the frames. Instead, a series of thin plastic pieces ran horizontally across the glasses to form what looked like open venetian blinds.
Shutter shades not only did not protect against UV rays, but they looked kind of stupid too. But then again, so did the ’80s big hair and pastel colors. One good turn apparently deserved another.
Not to be outdone by the boorish style of shutter shades, the late 2000s released their own iteration of sunglasses, that are really not sunglasses at all, with ‘slanties’. What are slanties? They are eyewear with a single slit for each eye, reminiscent of what ancient Inuit tribes may have worn when they invented the first form of eye protection by cutting slits in whale bones.
What makes slanties so bad is their size. The glasses – if you want to call them that – are purposely oversized in order to overwhelm the face. A good pair of slanties covers most of the forehead and blocks everyone’s view of the temples. And right in the center of the massive panel are two tiny slits that look terribly out of place.
3. Sea & Ski Slits
Sea & Ski made a pair of single slit sunglasses in the 1980s that looked like something Geordi La Forge, from Star Trek: The Next Generation, might wear to his next galactic beach party. Like the previously mentioned slanties, these slitted sunglasses offered virtually no protection against the sun.
4. Olympic Rings Sunglasses
Last on the list are the Olympic rings sunglasses that made their debut at the Los Angeles games. Although fewer people buy them than did back in 1984, these ridiculous shades can still be found wherever Olympic athletes gather for winter or summer games. It seems that some styles just never die.
5. Anything Worn by Elton John
Sir Elton John is known as much for his flamboyant fashion choices as his music. A few decades back, he was known for wearing some pretty unusual sunglasses. Some of his choices did not even look like glasses at all. There are so many strange designs that it would be unfair to try to pick just one or two for the list, so the entire Elton John collection comes in at number five on our list.
Olympic Eyewear, a designer and seller of several brands of wholesale eyewear, says that the history of sunglasses is replete with bad design ideas. That’s just the way the eyewear industry rolls. Still, style is a personal thing. What appeals to one person may be revolting to another. Thank goodness there is something for everyone.